Dating Rules: To Pay or Not to Pay

To Pay or Not to Pay

When you first begin dating, I have no question in my mind that men should pick up the first check. Yes, the ritualistic check payment dance should happen, but men should always win the war and grab the tab.

Hey, look he sprung for the Large Fry! 

This is not because you want to take his money and leave him broke, but this is because you are a beautiful, smart woman and he should be ever so grateful to be in your presence. Oh, yeah and also it’s because there is still a significant difference in men’s and women’s salaries. So, I’m just saying, until there is salary equality, we should at least get one free meal. You’re Worth It.  Right?

Just saying….

Once, the first date is over it is time for you to re-assess the situation. My rule of thumb is to always make an offer, even if he pleasantly shoots you down. On your second date you should insist on at least paying for some portion of the date. Say your date buys the passes to the movie, you should offer to pick up the popcorn (although you may want to reconsider that because the actual movie tickets are less than the price of snacks and refreshments). But make an offer, sure, it doesn’t have to be the whole dinner bill, but at least try to pay the tip! He must be a pretty great date if you decided to go out with him again, so don’t be a complete princess, unless of course, he insists.

Better get the Big Bucket! 

Traditionally men are the providers and women are the caregivers but with more women in the workforce, some less traditional men think that all bills and tabs should be split equally.  Women, although you may beg to differ, because we have to spend quite a bit of money on hair products, makeup and clothing to impress their drooling butts and we don’t ask for any retribution.  Oh, and if you’re dating a guy whose hair products are expensive as yours ….run! This guy screams high maintenance. That also goes for his wardrobe, car and other “flashy” items. Whose attention is he trying to get anyway?

http://genyhub.com/metrosexuals-a-thing-of-the-past

So, say this guy is keeper, what happens once you settle into a cozy little love nest, how do you manage expenses? If you are dating a traditionalist, he will continue to pay for anything and everything, so you have to find clever ways to treat him like dinners, sweet notions and great gifts. If you are dating a man hell bent on equality, then divvy it up and if you start worrying about your dwindling bank account use apps like Groupon or Living Social to help cut the costs. And finally, if you find yourself with a guy who is using your wallet like his own personal debit card, cut off his bank account and go out and get wined and dined again, cause a girls gotta eat and she gotta eat well.

Don't be afraid to indulge yourself. 

The PMS Monster

THE PMS Monster

So, yes, every month this evil monster lurches out of the dark, a horrible monster with giant fangs and a grisly, loathsome roar that can strike fear in the hearts of anyone whom crosses it’s path.  This terrifying creature is called the PMS Monster.

No matter whether you are a man, woman or child, you have come across this monster, or the dreaded the catastrophic wrath of a woman experiencing PMS.

  For all of those who have fallen victim to the PMS monster, remember, just like a werewolf on a full moon, it is temporary.  You can’t say you didn’t root on Michael J. Fox’s transformation into a hairy, scary monster basketball player, nor can you say you didn’t empathize with Fiona when she changed from gorgeous princess into the puke-green Ogre in Shrek, so why can’t the world be more on your side during this exasperating time.

Somehow each month due to hormone fluctuations, you transform from beautiful, confident woman into a drooling, growling zombie and even though the changes in your body are ten times harder on you then it is on him, he believes that you have only devised PMS as an evil plot just to make him miserable.

By Diana Zourelias

amazingartbydianaz.com

You just want to say “Yes, I made my body have go completely haywire, just so I could destroy your life.” And as you concentrate all your efforts on trying fight your bodies plunge into a weeks worth of exhaustion, irritability, memory lapses and of course the ever delightful “fat feeling” you get from retaining water, you suddenly realize that he is morphing into a PMS monster himself, but how could that be?

What you are experiencing is the latest in PMS Phonomenons, MALE-PMS. MALE-PMS stands for Male Aggravated Lapse of Empathy Pre-Menstural Syndrome. This medically “un-recognized” phenomenon is when you begin to PMS and you notice his mood and personality begins to change. He starts to act aggravated with the littlest things, he gets moody, he gets irritable because he can’t understand why you are frustrated and argumentative, so he in turn becomes a PMS Monster himself, and it’s all you can do not to fly into a rage screaming “you even had to take my PMS, didn’t you!” 

We have all been there and you are not alone. Many males have MALE-PMS, but since  this syndrome has never actually been researched or called a real illness in any medical periodical it is often misdiagnosed. Men instead are often mis-diagnosed as having the conditions of jerks or assholes instead.  If you believe like I do, maybe we can make that all change change.   MALE-PMS is real (well not-medically speaking) but it really could be and it could be treatable.  

In some actual legitimate medical mumbo-jumbo, I bring you Couvade Syndrome. Couvade syndrome is when a male experiences pregnancy-like symptoms when his partner is expecting.

According to the Mayo Clinic, Couvade Syndrome includes physical symptoms and psychological symptoms, which correlate to their partner’s hormonal changes.

Couvade Syndrome:

•       “Physical symptoms. These symptoms might include nausea, heartburn, abdominal pain, bloating, appetite changes, respiratory problems, toothaches, leg cramps, backaches, and urinary or genital irritations.”

•       “Psychological symptoms. These symptoms might include changes in sleeping patterns, anxiety, depression, reduced libido and restlessness.”

Not Couvade Syndrome, but still quite relevant- Picture Source- people.com

MALE-PMS must be stopped before it gets any worse!  I am not a doctor, but I am in complete belief that MALE-PMS is an illness affecting millions of men and it should be researched further. With a little effort by doctors and researchers, I have the belief that we can relieve men of this syndrome, so we can at least have a week where you will be the one and only monster in the household. Perhaps, maybe, just maybe, doctors will try to put men on hormone regulating birth-control pills (again) to regulate “their” cycles and you can throw your hands up and release all of those little sugar pills into the air!

Now, I’m sure this research will take years of testing before they are actually able to treat it, you know with testing and whatnot, so you will have to both deal with your rather monstrous situation for awhile.  Keep in mind that men are usually oblivious to emotional cues and signs, so unless you have a red signal that lights up at the beginning of PMS, try to give him a gentle forewarning, so he can prepare himself for battle.

Perhaps, an addictive PMS Monster Smart Phone game could be created which men could play to learn how to deal with the PMS Monster. The only way to win is to feed the monster delicious treats, jewelry and massage coupons until she turns back into a gorgeous woman again while he tries to avoid those pesky irritability bubbles, but of course, just like PMS, the next level is even harder! 

 

 http://feminspire.com