25 Things They Didn't Tell You About Planning Your Wedding

BEHIND THE BRIDE

I'm at sixty days until my wedding and I'm filling you in on the real feelings 

1. Yes, you will want the traditional everything, yes, you will hate yourself for wanting that and then at one point, maybe many years later, you will think it was worth it.

2. You will be so so exhausted that there are points you will want to run away, not from your fiancé, you would probably bring him too, but the daily planning and appointments will get to you at a certain point.

3. It will not work out the way you want. You can dream of something and search and search and search to make that vision come true. It won't. But don't worry you will be so tired you won't care. 

4. Another bride will make it look effortless. And you will hate her for it. 

5. You will scoff at the newly engaged who are all excited and cheery. "Man, they have no idea what's ahead of them" and encourage very small destination weddings.

6. Booking the honeymoon is probably the best day of the whole wedding planning thing. All you can think of is laying in the sun. Wait till a couple months before the wedding to book it and give yourself something to look forward to. You and the wedding will not be on speaking terms by then.  

7. You will feel guilty about everything. People spending money on you. Not being able to have a thousand bridesmaids. The distance people will have to drive. Guilt about everything.

8. You won't lose like 20 lbs before your day. Remember you are the rule, not the exception. You will probably just look like you do now, unless you're a stress eater and you might gain weight. 

9. Matching colors is evil. You have to carry swatches everywhere...just pick black and white. Pure white. Not off-white or Michael Jackson White. Make life easier.

10.Your groom will have an opinion. Whether it's something small or big. You envision it one way and him another, who wins in the end...someone's mother, or grandmother or aunt or not you or him, so quit fighting about it. 

11.  You will realize how many people in one room don't get along when you make your seating chart

12. You wish you would have spent a little extra and splurged on a wedding planner

13. Being engaged for a year is for sheep. Either bust it out in six months or wait a couple of years and enjoy it.  A year is the most inappropriate length of time to plan a wedding. 

14. Standing on the altar for the first time before your wedding is the most exciting, terrifying, surreal moment you can ever imagine.

15. You won't have your nails done for most of your engagement. Ain't nobody got time for that. 

16. All that wonderful time spent together before you get married will probably be spent at home because you can't afford to go out. 

17. You will try on your wedding dress as many times as you can. Because you want to live in it. 

18. You can plan everything down to the minute. Not everyone else lives on your schedule and that will drive you insane.

19. You will not have everyone come. Even those who mean the world to you and you completely understand, but emotionally heart tugging. Eventually, you will get over it and will be pleased at just inviting people who just make you laugh.  

20. You will be ok giving up on things you thought were the most important things in the world six months before. 

21.  You won't be sure if you love anything at all by the end including your dress, your venue, your flowers. You won't be mad about it though either. Let's do this! 

22. You will be part of a strange social media group of fellow financees that you probably haven't spoken to in years and they will make you feel like you are one of them and peaceful.

23. You will cry, freak out and be overly emotional 5,000 times before that day

24. You will be broke....sooo broke

25. You will hate/love/live every minute of it and know deep down that it will be your best day ever. Tornado, Hurricane, Snow Storm, you don't/won't care by the end! It will be the greatest day ever! 

I Loathe the Word Fiancé and Here's Why...

I Loathe the Word Fiance and Here's Why…

Growing up you have heard the word fiancé many times, however it us unknown until you have a "fiancé that you will learn to hate this word.  I am beyond hate at this point, in fact I loathe the word and avoid using the term at all costs. You begin with boyfriend and end with a husband, so why is there this crazy pretencious french identifier in-between? I mean it even has a ostentacious "acute accent" (which your keyboard doesn't always recognize)  above the "e". Even the way it's said, "Fee- ans- sayyyyyyyyyyyyy" sounds completely over-the-top, so why, why is this archaic term still in use?

Photo Credit: www.volleywood.net

Did you know that it even is spelled differently depending on which gender you are speaking about? You use Fiance' to introduce your male counterpart and Fiancee' for female? So not only do you have to use this foreign term to explain your current relationship status, but you also have to understand the French grammar behind it as well? 

According to Merriam Dictionary the origin of fiancee is a "promise" or "trust", which seems like a feasible definition of the word, but why haven't we come up with something a little more practical and less patronizing? Seriously, just saying the term "fiancé" equates the same response as if you were bragging about your summer home in Vale.

Let's look at some (not all) other french words still used in common vernacular

 'A La Mode, Adieu, Amateur, Ape'rtif, Attaché, Art Nouveau, Au Gratin, Au Jus, Baguette, Ballet, Bon Appe'tite, Bon Voyage, Bouquet, Brunette, Bureau, Cache, Cafe Au Lait, Carte Blanche, Chauffer, Clique, Conceirge, Cordon Bleu, Couture, Creme Brûlée, Crepe, Croissant, Decor, Decoupage, Cul De Sac, Demi-Glace, Eau De Toilette, Eclair, En Route, Entree, Excusez Moi, Extrodanaire, Facade, Faux, Flambe, Forte, Grand Prix, Hors D' Oeuvres , Liason, Marde Gras,  Menage A Trois, Montage, Mousse, Omlette, Prarie, Protege, Rapport, Role, Sabotage, Saute, Triage, Venue, Voila. 

With the exceptions of few, most of the words seem pretentious.  For example: 

"My fiancé brought me a bouquet of flowers while I sipped cafe au lait and devoured my sweet creme brûlée"at the corner patisserie.  The decor of the cafe was art nouveau and smelled of fresh crepes, eclairs, baguettes and croissants.  Perhaps later we will have a menage a trois with the brunette en route to dinner:

As you can see this is a pretty stuffy way of saying "my dude met me at Starbucks and brought me some Gerbers while I had coffee and a pastry. For desert we picked up a woman and had a threesome before heading to dinner". 

winterous.deviantart.com

Ok, maybe that whole story was a stretch, but you can see that our most common french words sound a little grandiose.  And with the word fiancé, it's not like you can get around it, perhaps you can say yes, my future husband, or even go old-skool and say my betrothed with a joking nudge, but basically you are stuck saying it, that awful word,  for the duration of your engagement. 

I had the pleasure of sitting next to another fiancee' and noticed that with little effort the word fiancé floated off her tongue as if she had been saying the word her entire life. She had no hesitation in saying it and even the delivery sounded much more American than French like the words toothbrush or stop light. She made it sound so easy, but it's not that easy for everyone. 

When I say it, somehow it seems like I am making some sort of announcement,  I will be meeting my FIANCE in a half an hour! My FIANCEEEEEE is right around the corner! At the same time my face squinches up and my voice rises into this weird pitchy tone because I am horrified that I have to utter the dreadful word once again. Then when the word finally comes out of my mouth, I internally shudder in shame and my face flushes in embarrassment as if I had just defecated in front of a crowd of strangers.  

Perhaps you have seen those "Pretty Girls Making Ugly Faces" photos which have been circling the web. Did you know they are not making the ugly faces on purpose, they are simply trying to say the word fiancé?

All I can think is that I still have months of fiancé introductions before I can finally lay this awful word to rest. In the meantime, I will practice whispering the phrase fiancé and mumbling it under my breath in order to draw as little attention as possible. 

Where my hatred of the word began….

Written by Mandi Bridgeman 

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